Cue the Telegraphs (Victory Garden)

(This is the sound I had running through my head just now. Plus this man's fantastic accent aids in the illusion of being a 1920's reporter on the trail of a hot scoop.)


Well, friends, we may have had a breakthrough in The Case of the Girl Who Can't Eat Anything. After chatting with multiple people about the things that I can't eat, I believe I've come to the conclusion that I have a gluten allergy.
*Cue Psycho slasher music here*
After thinking about it though, I realized that a lot of things that make me sick contain some sort of gluten.

Let's review:
Beer (barley or wheat)
Imitation Crab Meat (wheat)
Pizza (wheat)
Bread??? (Please, God, NO!)

I need to do some more experimenting, but this may be the final piece of my dietary puzzle. Maybe I'm not even lactose-intolerant! Maybe it's just been a latent reaction to gluten! Holy moly articholy.

I feel like I just found the Lindbergh baby, and he's been staring up at us from his crib the entire time.

Cat Count
Ducky has been up on the kitchen table twice this morning and is currently missing -- after demanding that I feed her the rest of her breakfast. She may be more wily than I give her credit for. . .

Victory Garden--A Brief History and Explanation

Briefly and in bullet point form:

• Foods rationed during WWII: Sugar, butter, milk, cheese, eggs, coffee, meat and canned goods.
• The government and businesses urged people to make gardening a family and community effort.
• Soybeans originated in China and Manchuria.
• Tofu is one food product made from soybeans and is a major source of protein in oriental diets.
• When the war started, the USDA exhorted farmers to produce much more of "the miracle bean," (soybeans) as they started calling it.

All information taken from The Wessels Living History Farm website.

As made obvious by my oh-so-subtle font amplification, I chose the name "Victory Garden" because many of the foods rationed are ones I can't eat, my family (mom especially) have really been good about trying new foods that are healthy for us all, and soybeans have become an important dietary staple for me.

A couple of exceptions:

• I will never give up coffee
• I don't have the room to plant my own veggies so I'll be going to the Farmer's Market instead

One of the biggest problems I've been having with not eating dairy and meat has been that I'm hungry all the time! So I decided for breakie this morning I would have some oatmeal and black tea. That should stick to my ribs for awhile. Fingers crossed.

Victory Garden

When I was younger, I was an incredibly picky eater. I remember sitting at the dinner table hours after my family had finished, left to stare at my asparagus, growing colder and slimier by the second. While I never resorted to the antics of my sister (i.e. sticking her carrots down the floor heating vent), I was not a happy camper when it came to eating my veggies. Broccoli was fine drowned in melted cheese but as for everything else--no, thank you. Even apples had to have the skins cut off or else I would gag as I tried to swallow them.

Suffice to say I've always had food issues.

In the past two months or so, I've realized that I have more food intolerances than I knew at first. Let's take a look, shall we?

Things that I'm allergic to:
1. Garlic
2. Pineapple (maybe)
3. Pollen
4. Oil paint
5. Keira Knightley

Things that make me sick:
1. Low-blood sugar (i.e. not eating enough)
2. Lactose
3. Beer
4. Red meat
5. White meat, in excess
6. Citrus, in excess (maybe)
7. Bananas (they're mushy and make me gag)
8. See previous list

As a result, I've been eating a fairly vegetarian and soy-based diet. Now, I do enjoy my veggies quite a bit--more so certainly than when I was younger. But it hasn't been quite so fun trying to find additional sources of protein and iron and all those other nutritional words that mean nothing to me. Also (since I'm in list mode). . .

Previously enjoyable activities that have now been ruined for me:
1. Baseball games (beer and hot dog)
2. Having a giant glass of milk with a warm fresh-out-of-the-oven brownie
3. Barbecues (guess who's going to be the urchin nibbling on the tomato and lettuce toppings while everyone else is gobbling up their giant hamburgers this summer)
4. Eating Caesar Salad (garlic)
5. Talking about Pride and Prejudice (NO! I don't mean the new one! I mean the mini-series that was created before it got ruined!)

This leads me to my point. I'm going to be posting a new segment every once in awhile entitled "Victory Garden." Having to watch what I eat, I think it will be interesting to see how long I can keep myself alive before I, as a weak gazelle, am forced to lie down beside the watering hole, curled up in the fetal position, whimpering to the scavenging predators that they win.

But as for now, I'm up and about, leaping around, hooves pleasantly pattering along the plains.

Currently, I'm headed in the direction of the Farmer's Market downtown.